120 | Reservoir
In 2021, I chose UNFOLD as my word of the year. In the past, I would often choose a word and then not remember what it was until I looked again at the end of the year. Last year, though, UNFOLD proved to be a gift. Anytime I felt anxious or pressured in the midst of my year of renewal and discernment, I would say to myself, “Let it unfold.” It was a word and gift of grace as I learned to let go, to move more slowly, to breathe, to find my way back to myself.
In reflection, I noticed that I chose UNFOLD from a place of intention and hope rather than from a place of fixing and self-improvement; so I’ve decided to return to that practice this year.
For 2022, my word is RESERVOIR.
This word has been mulling in my mind and spirit since I first heard this Bernard of Clairvaux (1090-1153) quote at a conference this fall:
The [person] who is wise, therefore, will see [their] life as more like a reservoir than a canal. The canal simultaneously pours out what it receives; the reservoir retains the water till it is filled, then discharges the overflow without loss to itself...You too must learn to await this fullness before pouring out your gifts, do not try to be more generous than God.
As I move out of my year of renewal and discernment and into a new season of intentional work, I am conscious of habits that have—over the years—contributed to feeling more like a canal than a reservoir, including:
Having unrealistic expectations of what I can get done in a day or week;
Adding to my day’s to-do list when I know there is no way I can possibly get it all done;
Waiting to the last minute to do things;
Unhelpful self-talk when I don’t get the important things done; and
Allowing my mental load to infiltrate down time to the point that it doesn’t feel restful.
As I move through this coming year, my goal is to shift two habits in order to live a life shaped more like a reservoir:
Start tasks and projects sooner; and
Honor time for rest and play.
This is the work I feel God inviting me into in this season. I feel as if Bernard of Clairvaux is speaking to me in saying, “you too must learn to await this fullness before pouring out your gifts.” So, I have a plan and some people who inspire me to accountability. Now I pray for the grace to live into this invitation and the freedom I hope to experience through it.
Reflection Questions
What might be God’s invitation for you in this season?
If you were to choose a word of the year, what words would you consider?
