057 | Healing & Heartbreak

One of the impacts of an extended season of grief, burnout, and a high volume of change was that I got really turned inward and my world shrunk. I know that healing is happening within me because there is room for my heart to break again. This is a good thing.⁣

⁣The other day I wept as I read historian Heather Cox Richardson’s March 6 edition of “Letters from an American” about the toll of the Covid-19 pandemic on the people of the United States. This was not new information but the way she presented it so starkly pierced my heart. She wrote:⁣

⁣“America currently has a population of about 331 million people. By the end of 2020, more than 83 million Americans were having trouble meeting bills or buying food, and by January 2021, 30 to 40 million Americans were at risk of eviction because they could not make their rent payments. This crisis hit women and people of color the hardest because they tend to work in face-to-face jobs, which did not translate to remote work, and because the loss of childcare drove women out of the workforce. Thirty-nine percent of low-income households saw job losses early in the pandemic.”⁣

⁣Because of my privilege, I have been insulated from these realities. My sense of caring has not been absent, but has been largely cognitive and my response has been primarily financial, supporting organizations that support those who are suffering. It was what it was—that has been my capacity and I won’t shame myself for that.⁣

⁣Now the Spirit is healing me and calling me into the world with more of myself at her service. What this will look like is still unfolding but I’m grateful for the movement and a renewed sense of possibility.⁣

⁣Here’s the thing. While organizing my home is a way of cultivating sanctuary that brings my family many benefits and reduces my mental load, it is not an end unto itself. Ultimately, it’s about creating capacity for:⁣

• ⁣ healing⁣

• rest⁣

• connecting⁣

• play⁣

• renewal⁣

• imagining the world as God would have it be, shaped by God’s expansive and redeeming love⁣

• serving with my heart, mind, and skills, not just my wallet. ⁣

⁣I am grateful my heart can break again. ⁣

⁣

What in the world breaks your heart?